Profile Cocky

Don’t wor­ry, ladies—next time I’ll write about The Pes­tif­er­ous Tunasnatch.

Twas FetLife, and the slimy chodes
Did wile and whee­dle in the threads:
Baku was in vaca­tion mode,
The Care­bears desked their heads.

Point at the Pro­file Cock and laugh!
The stolen porn, the Photoshop!
Unmask his limp, lethar­gic staff
His sog­gy, sod­den mop!”

He took his list­less lance in hand;
A self­ie snapped, like any star—
Uploaded he that puny wee
To craft his avatar.

Then as his spam­mish thumb­nails spread,
Abhorred became his wretched name,
His hubris fled that turgid head
The spot­ting groups began to flame!

Guf­faw! And snort! And cyn­i­cal retort!
The wit­ty barbs went snicker-snark!
He shrieked and wailed, to no avail
And flounced at their remarks.

Didst we deflate the Pro­file Cock?
And did he ban us from his posts?
Our group is saved! But still depraved!”
They crowed amidst their toasts.

Twas FetLife, and the slimy chodes
Did wile and whee­dle in the threads:
Baku was in vaca­tion mode,
The Care­bears desked their heads.